


Thaw

by Kloot



Category: Pride and Prejudice & Related Fandoms, Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2019-10-08 21:35:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 13,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17394122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kloot/pseuds/Kloot
Summary: Elizabeth's visit to Derbyshire with her Aunt and Uncle is delayed until February of the following year. While there, she again crosses paths with Darcy but an early morning ride ends in an accident. How will this change the course of Elizabeth and Darcy's relationship?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have read FF for a long time but this is my first story. It began to form while on a wintry walk around Lyme Park over Christmas (the setting for the BBC 1995 Pride and Prejudice) and here we are. I have the story mapped out and three chapters written. It will be around 11 chapters long (I don't know how to change this on the stats - if someone could point me in the right direction I'd be grateful). 
> 
> I don't know how likely it is for Elizabeth and the Gardiners to be travelling in February but it needed to be winter for the story to work. Darcy would, possibly, still be at Pemberley rather than London at this time as Parliament didn't return until January/February which would trigger the start of the season (or so a bit of searching online has lead me to believe). 
> 
> N.B. In this world, Lydia has not eloped with Wickham. I currently have no explanation of why, perhaps Mr Bennett grew a backbone and said no to her request to visit Brighton!
> 
> This work has not been checked for errors by anyone so if you spot anything, please let me know. 
> 
> Anyway, without further ado...gulp.

Chapter One

The sun had barely risen as he’d left that morning. It was his custom to ride as early as possible each day; estate business usually took much of his time and these solitary hours were precious to him.

As he reached the rise of the hill, he stopped and surveyed the land spread out beneath him. In the distance, he could see his home, Pemberley, in the weak morning sunlight. It was time for him to return, he knew, but he allowed himself a few moments of reflection. It had been a cold winter. Frost has bitten hard throughout the county. At times it felt as if the white blanket that had settled upon the land months before would never lift. But now it felt as if it were finally coming to an end.

Not that the green shoots of spring could be seen as of yet but as a man raised in the country, he could feel a shift in the air that promised new beginnings. Or maybe it was simply the events of the previous few days that led him to believe that the endless days of winter were finally over.

Had it only been 6 days since he first saw her again? A visit to Lambton, sheer chance, had seen him coming face to face with her in the bookseller’s. Elizabeth. At first, he could not believe it possible. Why was she here? Had he conjured her somehow? Months of trying to forget, to heal, gone in a moment.

She was even more beautiful than he had remembered.

He had said something, what he could not tell, and she had smiled and blushed before replying. An awareness of someone next to him made him recall Georgiana was with him and he turned to her.

“Miss Bennet,” _(Elizabeth. Always Elizabeth in his mind; the formal ‘Miss Bennet’ dropped long ago)_ , “May I present my sister, Miss Darcy?”

Pleasantries were exchanged _(why was she here? For him?)_ and he realised Elizabeth had turned and was speaking to him again. Smiling.

She had introduced him to her Aunt and Uncle and explained her Aunt was from Lambton. They were here visiting her family ( _not seeking him then_ ).

And then he had heard Georgiana speak; she had invited them to call at Pemberley for tea. He had told her of Elizabeth and their history during the dark nights of winter and, bless her, she had seen this chance and decided to take it for him. Days were suggested and the following day agreed upon.

He had smiled all the way home.


	2. Chapter Two

Tea the following day had become a return morning visit to the inn at Lambton and, just the previous night, a dinner at Pemberley. To see her in his home had made Darcy's heart ache with longing. He was trying so hard to show her that he had listened to her accusations in Kent. That he had changed. 

He had been wrong before, God knows he had been wrong about Elizabeth’s feelings so often, but he had a growing sense that she had begun to see him differently. To think of him with affection rather than loathing. That perhaps she had turned her heart towards rather than away from him. 

He had been out longer than he intended. The sun was higher in the sky now, and he knew he needed to return to Pemberley. There was a meeting with his steward this morning that he could not avoid but perhaps this afternoon, he would journey into Lambton in the hopes of seeing her again. 

But just at that moment, just as he turned his horse, Orion, towards home, he heard a sound that arrested his attention. A scream had echoed out, carried in the still winter air. He listened and yes, there it was again. He turned Orion towards it now and spurred him into action. Orion was quick and Darcy was a good horseman but he still felt as though it was taking him too long to get to the sounds. What was it? It certainly sounded as if someone was in peril. 

And then he saw her and it felt as if he had lost all the air from his body. 

Elizabeth. 

She must have been out walking; he knew she liked early morning walks from Kent. The small ponds that dotted Pemberley’s land had been frozen over for months. Georgiana and he had even been skating on them. But now the thaw was coming and the ice was not as thick as it had been. 

She was standing in the middle of a pond, her face a picture of terror, while the thinning ice cracked around her. 

She looked up, saw him and smiled in relief. Their eyes met and she opened her mouth as if to shout to him. A crack like a gunshot sounded through the air, the ice broke fully and she disappeared.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter.

Darcy spurred Orion on again. He was so, so close. As he neared the pond, he threw himself from the horse and screamed her name.

As suddenly as she had fallen, she surfaced. Darcy threw himself down onto his front and reached across the ice. If only he could touch her. He managed to clutch one of her hands but his hold was not secure; she slipped from his grasp and went under the water again.

Panic was beginning to grip him. It was not possible that he would lose her like this, just when it had seemed that there was hope. He knelt back on the solid ground and wrenched off his greatcoat.

She reappeared above the ice and took a breath. Her eyes again met his and he knew he would save her or die himself in the attempt.

Once again he lay and shouted her name. He could feel the ice beneath him shift and he prayed it would hold for long enough. He had captured her arm again now, a firmer grip this time. Slowly, he edged backwards, drawing her with him. The sound of the ice cracking let him know there was no more time. 

“Elizabeth, hold on to me.”

Her small, delicate hands clasped his arms, he took a breath and pulled with all that he was. Falling backwards and away from the ice, he felt her falling with him. She was safe


	4. Chapter 4

Darcy gathered her into his arms and held her still. She was soaked through and freezing. Her skin had taken on a deathly pall and her lips had a blue tinge to them. Darcy knew he had to get her back to Pemberley with all urgency.

He seized his great coat and wrapped it around her as best he could. Clasping his arms around her, he lifted her and held her tight. Not 10 minutes ago, he would have said to hold Elizabeth Bennet in his arms would have been the one thing he wished for above anything; now he would give Pemberley itself to be able to release her and for her to be well.

He called his horse towards him and stood. As he looked down again, he saw Elizabeth’s eyes were open and she was looking at him. Lifting her, he placed her onto his horse and jumped up behind her.

“Hold onto me Elizabeth. I’m taking you home”.  

He kicked his heels and spurred his horse on towards Pemberley. Years ago, he had ridden like this with Georgiana but Georgiana had not been half frozen and barely conscious. He wanted to force Orion into a gallop but was fearful that would put Elizabeth at further risk so held him at a steady trot. It was torture.

“Elizabeth, can you hear me? Stay awake dearest.”

She had held his jacket when they had first mounted Orion and now she tightened her grip. He could feel her whole body trembling, convulsing from the cold.

“M..Mr Da…Darcy?” Her voice was barely a whisper and he had to bend his head to hear her. “You s..s…saved me. I h…h…have to… I c…cannot.”

“Do not try to speak Elizabeth. Save your strength; we will be home soon my love”.

All of Darcy’s pretence had dropped away from him. He had wasted so much time feigning indifference towards her in Hertfordshire. The anger he had felt towards her after Kent had soon been turned in its proper direction. Since seeing her again in Derbyshire, he had been embarked on a careful act – trying to conceal as much as he revealed. He did not want to scare her away by showing all of his love for her. Had not wanted her Aunt and Uncle to know more than she had wanted them to know.

Now, now, when he had pulled her from that frozen pool, he knew he could not hide anything anymore. He loved her with all that he was. She was part of his very soul.

He pulled her closer still and felt her press her head onto his chest. She was speaking again but he could not hear her.

Finally, the drive of Pemberley came into view. He spurred Orion on, through the gates and under the archway into the inner courtyard. Awkwardly, he jumped off his horse and slid Elizabeth down after him, capturing her in his arms again. He ran up the steps and a footman opened the door for him, shock clearly written on his face.

“Morris, find Mrs Reynolds and have her bring Georgiana’s maid to my chambers immediately. We will need fuel for the fire, blankets and hot water.”

After a beat, the footman nodded and ran swiftly away from Darcy who had already turned to make his way to the family wing.

As he began to make his way up the stairs, he felt her move in his arms. She reached her hand up towards his face and laid a shaking palm against his cheek. Her voice was barely more than a whisper and once again, he lowered his head to her lips. “I sh…should have said y…yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not ride so have literally no idea how possible or probable it is for Darcy to lift and carry Elizabeth on his horse as he does in this chapter. I've seen it in films though and if any man is capable of such a thing, it has got to be Darcy, right?
> 
> The description of Pemberley, the gate way and arch leading to the inner courtyard, is once again Lyme Park. I have my doubts as to whether Darcy could get through the arch whilst riding a horse but a bit of creative license never hurt anyone!


	5. Chapter 5

_As he began to make his way up the stairs, he felt her move in his arms. She reached her hand up towards his face and laid a shaking palm against his cheek. Her voice was barely more than a whisper and once again, he lowered his head to her lips. “I sh…should have said y…yes.”_

* * *

  

Darcy stumbled as he heard her words. What did she mean? Yes to him? His heart soared as he considered the possibilities that lay behind her declaration. He knew, however, that Elizabeth must be dried and warmed as soon as possible if she was to avoid illness. If she was to live. The future, their future together, must wait.

As he turned into the family wing and made his way towards his chambers, he saw Mrs Reynolds hurrying from the other direction.

“Mrs Reynolds.” His breath was ragged now, the exertion and shock of events catching up with him. “Miss Bennet has fallen through some ice into a pond. She needs to be dried and made warm as soon as may be possible.”

He stood outside his chambers waiting for her to open the door.

“Yes, Sir, of course. Sir, forgive me but you cannot mean for her to be placed in your chambers!”

Darcy looked from Elizabeth towards his door and back again. What was he thinking? He could not lay her in his own bed! He had forgot for one moment that she was not truly his to care for. Not yet.

“May I suggest Miss Darcy’s room, Sir? It is early yet so there will still be a fire burning in there and it is close by.”

“Yes. Yes, thank you, Mrs Reynolds.”

He turned and walked through the door she had opened into Georgiana’s room. The maid, who he now realised must have accompanied Mrs Reynolds, lay a blanket on Georgiana’s bed and he gently lay Elizabeth down on it. His arms had never felt so empty. 

“She must be undressed from these wet clothes and dried quickly. Build up the fire. I have seen a man perish from a delay in such circumstances.”

As he spoke, he moved his hands to the ribbons of her dress then hesitated. How did these things work?

“Sir!”

The shock was clear on Mrs Reynolds face. What was he doing? Removing her dress? Lord help him. He dropped his hands and took a step away from the bedside.

“Mrs Reynolds. Ensure Miss Bennet is given all the care and attention Pemberley can offer.” He gave Elizabeth a last look and turned away to leave. “With God’s blessing, she will be the next mistress of it”. 

Elizabeth’s eyes followed him all the way out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am hoping to get in a regular posting schedule with a new chapter once a week on a Saturday. 
> 
> R.E. Darcy attempting to un-do Elizabeth's dress, research I have done suggests that until the mid to late 1810s, ribbon closures were far more popular than buttons. They were also easier to fasten and I felt that with 6 women in the household getting ready each morning, the Bennetts would go for ease over the latest styles. 
> 
> Also, the section with Darcy carrying Elizabeth into the bedroom and attempting to undress her MAY have been influenced by the 2008 BBC version of Sense and Sensibility in which Colonel Brandon carries Marianne home after she is caught in a storm.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have realised that I have been spelling Bennet wrong throughout the story. I am thoroughly ashamed of myself! I have been back through to correct the errors and to make up for it, I am posting the next chapter early.

Darcy closed the door behind him and rested his forehead against it. Images of Elizabeth flashed through his mind: her fine eyes; the curve of her smile; the way she rested her cheek on her hand as she read; her open and genuine laugh; the love she showed for her sisters; her courage in the face of Lady Catherine; her intelligence as she debated with him; her anger in the parsonage in Kent as she refused him; the shock that flashed over her face as the ice cracked this morning; the feel of her in his arms as he carried her through his home; the touch of her palm on his face.  He felt a sob rising in his chest and choked it back down.

What must be done? He knew there was something that must be done but his mind could not catch up with events. He shook his head and scrubbed his hands over his face. A doctor. The Gardiners.

He turned and started towards the stairs. Breaking out into a run, he took them two at a time. He needed help; where would Georgiana and Bingley be now? With a start, he realised it was still early – they would be at breakfast.

He gave a shout to the footman stationed in the hallway to order Bingley’s horse to be saddled and the carriage to be readied and stormed into the dining room.

He had hoped Bingley’s sisters would still be abed at this early hour but here they were, along with Bingley and Georgiana. On his entrance, silence descended. It was not to last. Bingley and both of his sisters began to exclaim.

Georgiana stood and looked closely at Darcy. She moved towards him and placed her hand on his arm. “Brother! What has happened? Are you well?” The concern in her voice made him look down at his own person. He was soaking wet, filthy and, he now realised, shaking. He took a breath.

“I am, Georgiana. I am well but there has been an accident involving Miss Bennet.”

Georgiana’s eyes went wide and she raised her other hand to her heart. Bingley stepped around the table and towards Darcy; his sisters retook their places.

“Darcy, what on earth has happened?” Bingley glanced around at the women in the room, “Is she…”

As quickly as possible, Darcy informed Bingley and Georgiana about the events of this morning. The sisters could hear or not as was their wont.

“She is upstairs,” Darcy turned his face back to Georgiana. “She is in your room, Georgie. Will you go to her? She needs one of us with her to care for her and I… I cannot.”

“I will do all that I can for her brother.”

As she moved to walk past him, Darcy reached for her hand. Their eyes locked and an unspoken message passed between them. _She is to be a Darcy, Georgiana. Care for her as one of us._ Of all people, Georgiana knew what Elizabeth was to him, what he hoped her to be.

Darcy turned now turned to Bingley. “Charles, I need your help. Elizabeth’s Aunt and Uncle are in Lambton and must be told what has happened. I need you to ride there straight away and inform them. While you are there, you must find Doctor Andrews and bring him back with you. I will brook no excuses, he must come. I have ordered your horse to be saddled. Ride ahead now and the carriage will follow you to return with the Gardiners and the doctor. You must make haste.”

Bingley did not fail to notice Darcy’s use of Miss Bennet’s given name but now was not the time to question him on that. “Yes, Darcy, of course. I will go directly”

Bingley gripped Darcy briefly on his shoulder and left the room.

Darcy followed him. As he left, he could hear Caroline Bingley’s voice echoing from the room, “What a fuss these Bennet girls enjoy making. And why is she in dear Georgiana’s room?”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have stolen a line or two from canon in this chapter but altered it slightly so it becomes about Darcy rather than Elizabeth.

_Darcy turned now turned to Bingley. “Charles, I need your help. Elizabeth’s Aunt and Uncle are in Lambton and must be told what has happened. I need you to ride there straight away and inform them. While you are there, you must find Doctor Andrews and bring him back with you. I will brook no excuses, he must come. I have ordered your horse to be saddled. Ride ahead now and the carriage will follow you to return with the Gardiners and the doctor. You must make haste.”_

_Bingley did not fail to notice Darcy’s use of Miss Bennet’s given name but now was not the time to question him on that. “Yes, Darcy, of course. I will go directly”_

_Bingley gripped Darcy briefly on his shoulder and left the room._

_Darcy followed him. As he left, he could hear Caroline Bingley’s voice echoing from the room, “What a fuss these Bennet girls enjoy making. And why is she in dear Georgiana’s room?”_

* * *

 

As soon as he had seen Bingley off, Darcy turned and strode back into Pemberley. He could have gone into Lambton himself, should have gone, but the thought of leaving Elizabeth here alone was unconscionable. He was not allowed into her room to care for her but knowing she was in his home and that they were under the same roof offered him some comfort.

Without realising, he had made his way back up to the family wing and was again standing outside the door to Georgiana’s room. What was happening in there? Was she awake? Had they managed to warm her yet? It took all his strength as a gentleman not to turn the handle and walk into the room. It took all his honour not to press his ear to the lock and strain to listen for what was being said.

Breathing deeply, Darcy took a step backwards, turned and walked to his own chambers. Once there, he found that his man, Staddon, had prepared a bath for him and was waiting to assist him.

“I thought you would wish to dress, Sir.”

Darcy was still in his clothes from that morning’s ride. He was again reminded of the state of his attire and knew he must be ready for when the Gardiners arrived at Pemberley. He must gain control over his emotions; it would not do for Mr Gardiner to see how he had been affected by Elizabeth’s accident. He must not display any indelicate display of regard, or any peculiarity of manner, where their two selves only were concerned, for fear of making Elizabeth uncomfortable.

With Staddon’s help, Darcy was cleaned and dressed. In no time, he was back pacing the corridor of the family wing. It had been around an hour since Bingley had left. It would have taken him around 30 minutes to ride to Lambton, perhaps the same again to discover the whereabouts of the Gardiners and Doctor Andrews. If all was well, by now they should be on their return journey to Pemberley.

He placed the palm of his hand flat against the cool wood of the door. _Be well Elizabeth._ If he could, he would gladly make a Faustian pact and swap any regard she may have had for him for her health, her life at this moment. If the price for her living was for him to be forever forsaken, he would gladly pay it. For her to be alive and well in the world was all her asked for but he knew that any such bargain was impossible. She simply must live and no bargain he could make would have anything to do with it.

He was jolted from his reflections by the handle of the door turning and Georgiana walking from the door.

“Brother! I was coming to look for you. Were you waiting here on the corridor?” She smiled at him knowingly and he felt his face flush. They turned from the door and began walking towards the staircase. “No matter. I was coming to find you to let you know how Miss Bennet does. She has been dried and warmed as well we could. Mrs Reynolds thought to bathe her but Miss Bennet did not seem alert enough to be placed in a bath and we wished to have her abed as soon as could be so it was decided to wait for Doctor Andrews to arrive before we attempted that. Miss Bennet is aware at times but drifts into sleep, a state which we are trying to promote as Mrs Reynolds feels it will help her recovery. She has asked for her Papa, Jane, her sister I believe, and… and she has said your name a few times brother.”

Georgiana glanced at him slyly to see his reaction to this statement. He had been listening attentively to all she had been saying but at her final statement he stopped short and stared down at her.

“My name, Georgiana? She asks for me?”

“Yes Brother. She was agitated earlier and was calling out for people she cared for - as I said her Papa, sister and, well… you? She seemed to calm when I told her you were just outside the room and had sent me to care for her.”

“She seemed to calm when you said…” His voice betrayed his astonishment at Georgiana’s statement. That Elizabeth would, in her distress, call for her father and her dearest sister was perfectly natural and to be expected. That she would call for him, would feel comforted by his nearness, relieved by the fact that his sister was there with her gave him a lightness he had not expected to feel.

“But she will be well Georgiana?”

“That I cannot answer. We must wait for Doctor Andrews to arrive. Do not fear Brother, we will do all that we can to ensure she recovers and” at this she gave him a knowing look “is returned in good health to those who love her.”

Darcy looked again at his little sister. When had the child he had been raising since the death of his father six years previous become this poised young woman standing in front of him, comforting him in his hour of need? He reached out and held her hand within his own.

“Thank you dearest. You offer me wise words and it is a comfort beyond telling to know you are caring for Miss Bennet.”

Georgiana squeezed his hand and walked away, back towards her own chambers to continue to take her place next to Elizabeth’s bedside.


	8. Chapter 8

_“But she will be well Georgiana?”_

_“That I cannot answer. We must wait for Doctor Andrews to arrive. Do not fear Brother, we will do all that we can to ensure she recovers and” at this she gave him a knowing look “is returned in good health to those who love her.”_

_Darcy looked again at his little sister. When had the child he had been raising since the death of his father six years previous become this poised young woman standing in front of him, comforting him in his hour of need? He reached out and held her hand within his own._

_“Thank you dearest. You offer me wise words and it is a comfort beyond telling to know you are caring for Miss Bennet.”_

_Georgiana squeezed his hand and walked away, back towards her own chambers to continue to take her place next to Elizabeth’s bedside._

* * *

 

Darcy felt dazed as he walked back towards the entrance hall to await the arrival of Mr and Mrs Gardiner. Could it be possible that Elizabeth returned his feelings to such a degree? Was Georgiana allowing her own hopes to see things in Elizabeth’s behaviour that were not there?

And yet she had said his name. Had calmed when told he was near.

Suddenly, the possibilities of a future he had not dared to dream of since Kent were once again opened up to Darcy. He imagined carrying Elizabeth through his home once again, but this time as his bride. He thought of standing before the door to his chamber and imagined Elizabeth herself turning the handle to open it. He pictured... no this would not do.

Elizabeth was in danger in his very home and he was imagining the kind of things that no gentleman should imagine of a gentlewoman.

And what if she were not well? She had not even been awake enough to bathe. Darcy swallowed and quickly pushed that image aside. Where was Doctor Andrews? Would Bingley never return?

But now he could hear the sound of horses on gravel, wheels turning.

Darcy hurried to the door and went out into the main driveway. Bingley jumped down from the carriage as soon as the step was lowered closely followed by Mr Gardiner who turned and handed down his wife. Doctor Andrews followed them. Nodding his thanks to Bingley as he walked, Darcy stepped forward to greet them.

“Mrs Gardiner, Mr Gardiner. I am more sorry than you can know that your return to Pemberley is under such circumstances. Doctor Andrews, thank you for coming so promptly”.

Mrs Gardiner turned to him, “Mr Darcy, please, tell us how our Lizzy does. What has happened?”

“She is with my sister in her room, Mrs Gardiner, and is being attended by my housekeeper Mrs Reynolds, who I would trust with my own life. I will take you straight to her”.

As they walked through Pemberley, Darcy quickly informed them of the facts of this morning’s events. As she listened, Mrs Gardiner held her hand to her mouth and her eyes went wide.

“Oh our poor Lizzy.”

Doctor Andrews began to question Darcy. He had been the Darcy family doctor since Darcy himself had been a small child; had nursed both he and Georgiana through their share of childhood ailments; had been with his mother as she drew her last breaths. “Mr Darcy, before I see Miss Bennet, I want to ascertain a few details. Could you estimate for how long she was under the water?”

“I would say no more than a minute in total.” It had felt like a lifetime.

“How long would you say it took you to return? By which I mean, how long was Miss Bennet exposed to the cold?”

“I rode as hard as I could but could not risk Miss Bennet falling from my horse. I would say it took around 10 minutes.”

“Very good. And she was awake when you returned to Pemberley? Did she speak at all? Was she lucid?”

Darcy thought of the feel of her in his arms, the touch of her hand on his face, her words to him as he had carried her in his arms and flushed.  He glanced at Mr Gardiner but could not meet his eye.

“Yes, she was awake throughout much of the ride to Pemberley. She spoke to me two or three times throughout the journey and once after we had returned. She was intelligible and, I believe, aware of where she was and who she way talking to. She said my name and referred to a conversation we had held at a previous date.” He was babbling, he knew.  He was still talking, he could hear himself although he knew not what he said. “Anyway. My sister has been with her since so she will be able to tell you how Miss Bennet has been since our return home. To Pemberley.” Shut up Fitzwilliam! Darcy forced his mouth closed and swallowed.

“I see,” returned Doctor Andrews. “Perhaps it is best if I see Miss Bennet myself now”.

They had been walking throughout this and had now reached the family wing. Darcy showed Doctor Andrews and Mrs Gardiner into the room. Mr Gardiner remained outside with Darcy.

“Shall we await Doctor Andrews in my study Mr Gardiner?”

Edward Gardiner gave Darcy a long, measured look before nodding his head. “Yes, we shall.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters today as Chapter 8 was such a short one. 
> 
> There are a couple of lines from the novel in this chapter which I have tweaked to fit. Can you spot them?

Darcy felt nervous around the older man. He knew Elizabeth respected her aunt and uncle from the way that she spoke about them. He was desperate not to make himself a fool in front of him.

They had been waiting in Darcy’s study for perhaps 15 minutes. Mr Gardiner had questioned him again on the events of that morning and was pacing forwards and backwards as he spoke. He was, Darcy could tell, very worried about Elizabeth.

“Thomas will never forgive me if anything happens to his Lizzy. She is his favourite, you see. He does love all of his girls but Lizzy… Lizzy is the one who is most like him; she shares his love of literature and the follies of other people.”

“Yes” Darcy replied smiling, recalling a conversation with Elizabeth many, many months ago in a Netherfield drawing room “she dearly loves to laugh.”

 Mr Gardiner turned to look at Darcy. He and his wife had been much surprised when they had met the Darcys in the bookshop in Lambton and had been greeted with such warmth. It was evident that Elizabeth was much better acquainted with Mr Darcy than they had before any idea of. Looking at him now, it was evident that he was very much in love with her.

Darcy looked up to see Mr Gardiner standing before him, staring down with a curious expression on his face. Darcy met his eyes and knew that Mr Gardiner knew the truth. But he had no reason to fear Mr Gardiner’s curiosity; it was not his wish to force Darcy’s communication.

It was at that moment that Doctor Andrews was shown into the room. He nodded in respect at both of the men in the room. “Mr Darcy, Mr Gardiner. I was told I would find you here.” He turned to Mr Gardiner “Sir, if you are agreeable, I would like to discuss your niece’s condition”. 

With a nod to Mr Gardiner, Darcy stood to walk out of the room. “I will leave you now.” It was the last thing in the world he wanted to do.

OoOoO

Darcy paced the floor outside his study, desperate to discover what was being said. It felt like it had been some time since he had left Mr Gardiner with Doctor Andrews. How he wished he had the rights of a husband, even a betrothed man, to stay inside the room and hear the Doctor’s report on Elizabeth’s health. He would overturn heaven and earth to help her but he knew he had no real rights to do anything more than he was already doing without going against propriety. Damnation, he had never felt so useless.

 He turned as the door opened and the Doctor stepped out.

“Mr Darcy. I have spoken to Miss Bennet’s uncle about her recovery. She must not be moved until she is well. I trust you will be amenable to this.”

Amenable! Darcy could no more imagine Elizabeth leaving Pemberley at this moment than he could imagine pulling the house down around her piece by piece.

“Of course Doctor. Miss Bennet will be offered every care Pemberley can offer her”

“Very well. I will return tomorrow to check on my patient. And you, Sir? I understand you played your part in her rescue and were exposed to the cold as well. Do you feel any ill effects? Will you let me examine you?”

“Who has told you this? I am perfectly well. I bathed when I returned and I assure you I am well.”

“Your sister spoke to me of her shock at the state you were in on your return after I had examined Miss Bennet. You must promise to call on me if you do begin to feel any ill effects of your adventures. Why, I remember when you broke your arm when you were a boy. What were you then, 7, 8 years old? You were pale and shaking but did not offer so much as a tear as I set your arm. You always were as stubborn as a goat!”

As he left the house, Doctor Andrews shook his head and laughed at Mr Darcy with all the rights that come from having attended him through the scrapes of his childhood.

OoOoO

Mr Gardiner was sitting looking into the flames of the fire as Mr Darcy re-entered the room.

“Come Mr Darcy, I will tell you all the good doctor has told me about our Lizzy and you can help me decide what best is to be done.”

Darcy sat in the chair opposite and leaned in to listen to Mr Gardiner.

“The Doctor spoke to her and says she was able to answers his questions with some intelligence so he doesn’t believe her brain has been affected by the incident. Lizzy took a warm tincture that he gave to her. She is now asleep but is still very cold to the touch and for this he simply recommends what your sister and housekeeper were overseeing when we arrived: a warm fire and plenty of blankets. He has asked that Elizabeth remain here until he says she is well enough to move. I dislike the asking of this but would this be possible?”

“Please, Mr Gardiner, do not trouble yourself over such considerations. Miss Bennet must of course remain until she is restored to good health and I ask that yourself and Mrs Gardiner move from the inn at Lambton to Pemberley so that you are closer to your niece as she recovers.”

“That is a very generous offer Mr Darcy and one that I cannot help but accept. The doctor feels Elizabeth should probably recover with no ill effects but says we will know more when she awakes. The question I now face is, do I write her father now to inform him what has happened or do I wait to see how Elizabeth fares? If I write now, I could risk worrying the family without just cause. However, if I wait and she takes a turn for the worse, it would cause a delay in her father journeying to her. What are your thoughts?”

Darcy felt the weight of this question. He was being asked to be part of a decision made for Elizabeth as if he were connected to her, linked. It was a generous gesture from Mr Gardiner, recognition that Darcy was not simply a mere acquaintance but was something more. That there was the possibility for something more.   

“On consideration, Sir, I believe it may be better to wait. If Miss Bennet is still unwell, or worse, later today, I am happy to arrange for an express rider to take a message to Mr Bennet to inform him of the fact. If not, we can send a letter, or an express if you would rather, tomorrow once it is clearer what her condition is. Will that serve?”

Mr Gardiner gave a moment’s pause before he stood. “Yes, Yes I believe it will serve. Thank you for your council Mr Darcy. And now, I believe I will find my wife and arrange our move from Lambton.” He stepped forward and grasped Darcy by the hand. “Thank you for all you have done for us this day. When I consider what may have happened if you had not been there when Lizzy fell…”

Darcy shook the hand of Elizabeth’s uncle but found he could not reply to such a heartfelt thanks, for in saving Elizabeth had he not also allowed himself a chance of salvation?


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An bit of angst in this chapter. Sorry.

_Mr Gardiner gave a moment’s pause before he stood. “Yes, Yes I believe it will serve. Thank you for your council Mr Darcy. And now, I believe I will find my wife and arrange our move from Lambton.” He stepped forward and grasped Darcy by the hand. “Thank you for all you have done for us this day. When I consider what may have happened if you had not been there when Lizzy fell…”_

_Darcy shook the hand of Elizabeth’s uncle but found he could not reply to such a heartfelt thanks, for in saving Elizabeth had he not also allowed himself a chance of salvation?_

* * *

Darcy stood in his study, glaring out of the window at the gathering gloom. It had been six nights since Elizabeth had fallen into that frozen pond. Six nights since he had ventured to give his opinion to Mr Gardiner about sending for Mr Bennet. Then, he had been concerned about Elizabeth but had truly believed it to be the best course. Wait. She will be well.

Now though. Now he knew that it had been folly to wait. That even as he had spoken, Elizabeth’s body had begun a battle that she was she fighting still.

That first night, he had retired in the happy knowledge that it was within his power to offer Elizabeth all the care she could require. She was but two rooms down from his in his own home. In a day, perhaps two he would go to her and ask her what she had meant when she had placed her shaking palm on his cheek and told him of her regrets. He would again humble himself in front of her but this time he would convince her of his love for her instead of allowing his own insufferable pride to stand in his way. Yes, she would soon be joined to him in law as she was already joined to his soul.

It had been past midnight when he had been roused from his bed. Staddon was shaking him awake with a candle in his hand. It took Darcy but moments to realise why this would be happening tonight of all nights. Mr Gardiner had requested Darcy be awakened. Elizabeth was very ill indeed.

Darcy had left his room at hearing this, had charged into Elizabeth’s room and was only made to see the impropriety of this when Gardiner raised his voice.

“Mr Darcy! Sir! I must insist you leave this room. These are exceptional circumstances, I will allow but this, I cannot permit.”

Darcy had stared at Gardiner as if he wanted to run the man through. He did not leave. 

“I demand to know what is happening with Elizabeth. She is worse?”

Mr Gardiner scrubbed his hand across his face. “Yes. Yes, she is very much worse. I fear we must send for the doctor tonight.”

Darcy approached the bed and could see that Elizabeth was gasping for air. Every breath seemed to involve a Herculean effort on her part.

“I have known this aliment before. She cannot breathe. Bates, is it?” Darcy spoke to the maid who had been stationed in Elizabeth’s room overnight.

“Yes, Sir” she bobbed a curtsey as she spoke.

“Run and wake Mrs Reynolds. Have her send a man to Lambton for Doctor Andrews. It is a matter of upmost urgency. Go to the kitchens, boil some water and bring a pan up to this room. Run now!” 

Darcy turned to Mrs Gardiner who was sitting with Elizabeth on the bed.

“She must be raised up. My mother was sickly and had incidents of this throughout her life. Sit her up. Here.”

Darcy was pushing down memories of his mother at her worst: the terrible rattle that would emerge as she fought for her next breath; Mama clinging to his father, desperate for relief; his father talking to her to reduce her fear; a boy forgotten in the corner of the room, scared and alone.

He moved towards Elizabeth’s bed and held onto her arm. He could feel Mr Gardiner’s eyes on him but did not care. Nothing was more important now than ensuring Elizabeth was helped; he could be admonished by her uncle afterwards.  

“Look at me Elizabeth.” She turned her head and stared into his eyes. “Look at me and only at me. I am going to raise you into a seated position. It will make your breath easier to come. You are panicking now and need to calm down. You need to listen to me and slow your breathing. Breathe with me now Elizabeth.” He spoke low and calmly to her. Throughout his speech, he had moved so that he was now sitting in front of her on the bed itself. Her hands gripped his forearms and he had pulled her towards him so that she was seated rather than lay down. She was calming now, breaths becoming longer and less of an effort to take.

Mrs Reynolds entered the room with a pan of steaming water carried on a tray. “Bates told me that Miss Bennet had taken a turn and described what was happening. It sounds very much like the sickness that used to take the late Mrs Darcy, Sir. And I can guess why you called for hot water, it used to aid your mother terribly.”

“Yes, yes Mrs Reynolds. Now, bring the water here,” Darcy commanded. “Mrs Gardiner, have you a shawl, a cloth to cover Elizabeth’s head with?”

Mrs Gardiner bustled around the room and returned with something. The tray was rested on the bed by Mrs Reynolds and Darcy moved Elizabeth so that she could breathe in the steam coming from the hot pan.

“Breathe as deeply as you can Elizabeth. This will help you further.” He had shifted to allow the tray to be placed onto the bed but Elizabeth still gripped his arm with one of her hands and so he sat back down next to her, still talking to her in that low rumbling voice of his to reassure her.

As the steam cleared and Elizabeth’s breathing began to return to something like normal, Darcy realised just how improper it was for him to be in the room. He was in his naught but his nightshirt and banyan. Elizabeth was in her nightgown. He was sitting on her bed while she was in it. He swallowed. Lord help him.

Mrs Reynolds returned to the bed to remove the pan of now cooling water. Elizabeth nodded her thanks and gradually sank backwards towards her pillows. Her breathing had eased but there was yet a familiar rattle to it that he did not like. And still she held onto his arm.

“Miss Bennet? Miss Bennet? Elizabeth, is that better?”

She opened her eyes to look at him and nodded her head before she closed her eyes again.

Darcy placed his hand over hers and ran his thumb over her knuckles.

“I must leave you now. Your aunt and uncle are here and Doctor Andrews will be with you presently. The danger has, I hope, passed.”

Elizabeth turned her head to look at his again. “You are leaving?” Something flashed across her face that he could not read. Fear? Disappointment?

“I am Miss Bennet. I believe I must.”

“Do not go.”

Darcy swallowed hard and looked up at Mr and Mrs Gardiner who were still standing close to the bed.

“Now, now, Lizzy,” began her uncle in a placating voice. “Mr Darcy cannot remain in your room all night. You know that as well as he. If you are taken ill again, he is just down the hall. Is that not correct, Mr Darcy?”

“Yes, it is. I am but two doors away, Miss Bennet. Your uncle and aunt have leave to send for me if you need me again. I will come the instant I am called, no matter what.” He leaned in closer to her, so close that he hoped what he said next only she could hear. “I would stay if I were allowed dearest Elizabeth but I am not. And I fear your uncle with remove me with some force if I do not leave now!”

Her felt her hand tighten on his arm before she let go to allow him to stand. He bowed to her and Mrs Gardiner and gave some instructions to Mrs Reynolds before quitting the room.

OoOoO

He did not sleep for the rest of the night, instead paced his room demanding regular updates on Elizabeth’s condition from Mrs Reynolds. Doctor Andrews called to see him after he had examined Elizabeth. By this time, Darcy had dressed and was ready for the day. Sleep would not welcome him again that night.

“Mr Darcy. Mr Gardiner felt you would want me to share as many details of Miss Bennet’s condition with you as I am able.” At Darcy’s nod, the doctor went on. “She is worse than I had hoped. She is feverish and seems to be developing an ailment on her lungs. Your prompt treatment earlier helped her a great deal and I suggest the same if she should be ill in a similar way again. You did well to remember the treatment your father used to use for your mother.”

Darcy nodded his thanks to this unwanted praise and asked “Will she become ill again?”

“Yes, I believe she may. I had hoped she had escaped her dunking with naught but a cold ride back to Pemberley but it appears, despite all you did, she will not. I have bled her of course but the fever will probably continue to rise. This may yet be the beginning.”

Doctor Andrews had been proven right in his prophecy. It had been but the beginning. Elizabeth had fought for her breath on too many occasions since that first dreadful time as her fever mounted. She had drifted in and out of consciousness and more often than not, was insensible as to what was happening around her. Each time she fought for her breath, Darcy had sat with her and talked as she struggled. Each time she had clung to him as if he were all that was preventing her from slipping through that veil through which none returned. If he had thought he loved her before, now he realised his love was fathomless. He had held her while she fought for her very life and been the one who she had clung to in her desperation.

She could not die. She could not. He would not allow it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell I am asthmatic? The remedies Darcy uses, sitting Elizabeth up, trying to stop her from panicking and steam, are all things that I have found useful over the years when having difficulty breathing.


	11. Chapter 11

_Doctor Andrews had been proven right in his prophecy. It had been but the beginning. Elizabeth had fought for her breath on too many occasions since that first dreadful time as her fever mounted. She had drifted in and out of consciousness and more often than not, was insensible as to what was happening around her. Each time she fought for her breath, Darcy had sat with her and talked as she struggled. Each time she had clung to him as if he were all that was preventing her from slipping through that veil through which none returned. If he had thought he loved her before, now he realised his love was fathomless. He had held her while she fought for her very life and been the one who she had clung to in her desperation._

_She could not die. She could not. He would not allow it._

* * *

They had sent word to Longbourn the day after the first attack. Darcy had wanted to send an express rider from Pemberley but as soon as Bingley learned of what had happened, he insisted on going.

“You know I am fast on a horse, Darcy. I can ride neck or nothing if I need to and dash it all, I need to now. I know the journey and it will be better if Mr Bennet is given this news by someone he knows rather than a letter delivered by a paid hand. I will ride hard and accompany them back here. Trust me to do this for you in your stead Darcy.”

So to Longborn Bingley had gone that very day. Darcy estimated that at this time of year three days hard riding would have him at the door of Mr Bennet’s study with a letter from Mr Gardiner in his hand. And then what? A carriage prepared, Mr Bennet and Bingley bundled inside? Would Jane Bennet accompany them? It would be a hard journey for a woman to make if they meant to travel at speed but Darcy knew Elizabeth would be made easy by seeing her father and her eldest sister again.

Darcy was still stationed in the window looking out over Pemberley’s grounds as the night gathered in on him. They would not now arrive this night, such was certain. He did not yet know what he expected when they did arrive. Would their arrival signal a miraculous recovery in Elizabeth? Or was she simply waiting to see them one more time before she…

Darcy heard his own sob rip out from him as he allowed this thought that had swirled around his head for the past almost sennight to take root. She could not die, she could not. She would be his wife, his lover, the mother of his children. He would hold her on a bed on other nights when her breath did not come as if tore from her body in a battle to survive. She would look at him with eyes full of love and desire not fear and desperation. She would be his as much as he would be hers.

He had known so much death. At times he had felt suffocated by the sorrow of living on when almost all of those he loved the most had left him. His mother had been brought to bed twice with a brother and sister he had never known but who had been embraced by the cold earth rather than a loving family. Georgiana had been a sickly baby, cosseted by all around her for fear she would follow her siblings and add to the losses of the Darcy family. His mother had been ill for so long he barely remembered her healthy. Georgiana had been just walking when his mother had succumbed to her final illness and his father was but a shadow of himself after that day. His father’s death six years ago had made Darcy the master of Pemberley. He had wept the night his father had died; wept for his lost father and for the weight of responsibility that had settled upon him.

He could not add Elizabeth to this sorry list.

OoOoO

He felt himself jolt suddenly awake. He was still in his study and, it appeared, had fallen asleep in a chair. It was quite dark now, the candles had spluttered out and the fire was low. He could not estimate what the time was.

Suddenly, as if from a distance, he heard Georgiana call his name. Was this what had awakened him? Did Elizabeth need him and he was not there?

“Brother? Fitzwilliam, where are you?”

In the dark, he stumbled towards where he hoped the door was. It swung open as he neared it and his sister was lit by the pool of light flowing from the candle she held in her hand.

“What is it? Am I needed? Is Elizabeth unwell again?” He felt the panic within him begin to rise as he pushed past Georgiana. She was speaking to him now but he couldn’t hear her in his desperation to get to Elizabeth. It was not until Georgiana clutched his arm and shouted his name, in a manner in which she had never spoken to him before, that his progress was arrested and he actually stopped to look at her. Tears were streaking down her cheeks but he realised that she was smiling.

“She is awake Brother. The fever has broken.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in posting. I have taken a line or two from canon for Caroline Bingley here.

_Suddenly, as if from a distance, he heard Georgiana call his name. Was this what had awakened him? Did Elizabeth need him and he was not there?_

_“Brother? Fitzwilliam, where are you?”_

_In the dark, he stumbled towards where he hoped the door was. It swung open as he neared it and his sister was lit by the pool of light flowing from the candle she held in her hand._

_“What is it? Am I needed? Is Elizabeth unwell again?” He felt the panic within him begin to rise as he pushed past Georgiana. She was speaking to him now but he couldn’t hear her in his desperation to get to Elizabeth. It was not until Georgiana clutched his arm and shouted his name, in a manner in which she had never spoken to him before, that his progress was arrested and he actually stopped to look at her. Tears were streaking down her cheeks but he realised that she was smiling._

_“She is awake Brother. The fever has broken.”_

* * *

 

 

 

Elizabeth had not needed him through that night and when Doctor Andrews had visited her, he had indeed proclaimed that the fever had broken. Elizabeth was breathing easier, he declared, and it seemed she was at last out of danger. On being told this news, Darcy had nodded his thanks and shook the good Doctor’s hand. When he was once again alone, he had fallen to his knees and thanked God for sparing Elizabeth.

The morning had brought Darcy to the doorway of Elizabeth’s room. Now she was safe, he could not permit himself the delicious agony of being in her chambers, of sitting on her bed, but he had to see her to fully believe she was out of danger. As he stood there, beholding her, she weakly turned her head to look at him. A smile lit her face as she saw him and she held his eyes for a long moment before mouthing ‘thank you’ and closing her eyes again.

It was enough. It would serve for now.

OoOoO

Darcy knew he had neglected his guests. He had avoided Miss Bingley and the Hursts more than usual over the past sennight and that was why, he told himself, he now sitting to tea with Georgiana, Caroline Bingley and Lousia Hurst. Where Mr Hurst was he neither knew nor cared.

He had stopped listening to Caroline Bingley some moments ago but was recalled to the conversation by her use of Elizabeth’s name. He turned to her and realised she was awaiting a reply.

“I apologise Miss Bingley, I was inattentive for a moment. Of what did you speak?”

“Dear Mr Darcy, no wonder you are inattentive. You have been greatly taken advantage of by Miss Bennet and the Gardiners who seem never to think of leaving Pemberley. I suppose a mere tradesman and his wife cannot believe their fortune in being permitted to stay at such an estate.”

Darcy could feel the disbelief and anger at Miss Bingley’s rudeness beginning to rise inside of him. As he struggled to contain his temper, she continued.

“I was merely stating that I believe from Georgiana that Miss Eliza Bennet is well again and will, I hope, be soon on her way from Pemberley leaving us all in peace. She has trespassed on your good nature for long enough and must now be content with a tale to tell all when she returns to the backwater from whence she came. It will give her something to make her interesting I suppose. For all her proclaimed beauty in Hertfordshire, I must confess that I never could see any beauty in her. Her face is too thin; her complexion has no brilliancy; and her features are not at all handsome. Her nose wants character; there is nothing marked in its lines. Her teeth are tolerable, but not out of the common way; and as for her eyes, which have sometimes been called so fine, I never could perceive anything extraordinary in them. They have a sharp, shrewish look, which I do not like at all; and in her air altogether, there is a self-sufficiency without fashion which is intolerable.''

Around halfway through this speech, Darcy had begun to rise from his chair until he was raised to his full height. He gripped the tea cup he was holding in his hand so hard that it was at risk of shattering.

“Enough! Woman enough!” replied Darcy who could contain himself no longer, “For months, nay years I have listened to an endless prattle from you and I have reached my tolerance for your rudeness and impertinence. You know not of what or whom you speak. Elizabeth Bennet is not only one of the handsomest women of my acquaintance, she is also the woman I admire more than any other in the world. How dare you sit here, in my home, and wish my guests away? The Gardiners are welcome here for as long as they wish to stay. Elizabeth’s life has been in danger and it has been one of the greatest privileges of my existence to be by her side throughout her illness. My only hope now is that I will be permitted to remain by her side. And you, madam, will respect Elizabeth or you will leave Pemberley today, never to return. Do I make myself clear?”

Miss Bingley looked up at Darcy with wide eyes. When she realised he expected an answer, she very slowly nodded her head.

“Very well. Mrs Hurst. Georgiana.” Darcy bowed to the two remaining woman. Mrs Hurst looked back at him with eyes as wide as her sister’s but Georgiana allowed a smile to play around the edges of her lips and she nodded farewell to her brother.

As Darcy strode from the room, he knew he should feel ashamed of his outburst, perhaps should even go back and apologise for speaking to Miss Bingley in such a way. But Darcy felt no such shame. Elizabeth and her family were being disparaged and he had defended her. No, as he walked away he felt naught but pride.

 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay again. Only two chapters left.

_As Darcy strode from the room, he knew he should feel ashamed of his outburst, perhaps should even go back and apologise for speaking to Miss Bingley in such a way. But Darcy felt no such shame. Elizabeth and her family were being disparaged and he had defended her. No, as he walked away he felt naught but pride._

* * *

 

That afternoon brought the Bennet family carriage to the doors of Pemberley. They were seen on their approach and by the time the carriage was slowing to a stop on Pemberley’s driveway, Darcy was there waiting for it.

Elizabeth’s father stepped out of the carriage first. He looked much older than he had the last time Darcy had been in his presence. Clearly, the hard travel and anxiety over the state of his daughter’s wellbeing had taken its toll.

“Lizzy, my Lizzy? Where is she? Does she live?”

As he spoke, he looked frantically at Darcy before skimming his eyes over the front of the hall, as if he expected to see Elizabeth waiting for him. Or else see the house bedecked in black crepe.

“She is well, Mr Bennet. She has fought hard and is out of any immediate danger.”

Mr Bennet looked for a moment as if he were going to swoon. Darcy stepped forward and held him by the arm. Behind, he could see Bingley handing Jane Bennet down from the carriage, relief writ large on her face.

“Lizzy is well did you say Mr Darcy? May we see her?”

Darcy, afraid to release Mr Bennet, sketched an awkward bow towards Jane Bennet. “Of course Miss Bennet. Please, follow me and I will show you to her room.”

OoOoO

Bingley had shared with Darcy the horror of the journey he had undertaken to bring Mr and Miss Bennet to Pemberley. They knew not what they would find on arrival but with every mile, it seemed Mr Bennet’s fears rose until he seemed almost sure Elizabeth would no longer be of this earth when they arrived. Jane Bennet had tried her best to calm her father and assure him all would be well but his natural pessimism won out.

They had spent two nights at coaching inns during their journey. Bingley was thankful he had accompanied them as it seemed Mr Bennet was in such a state that he was incapable of arranging things. It fell to Bingley to see to rooms, organise the changing of the horses when they stopped and ensure they had provisions for their journey. It seemed somehow natural, therefore, that Jane Bennet had turned to him with questions on how they were to proceed and then for support when she herself began to fear that all hope was lost.

Bingley did not say as much to Darcy but it was clear that they were each as in love with the other as they had been all those months ago in Hertfordshire. What a fool he had been to separate them. Was love so common that one could throw it away when it was found? He would interfere no longer.

Jane Bennet had chosen to stay with Elizabeth and have a tray sent up to her for dinner that evening but Mr Bennet had eaten with the rest of the house. After dinner, he requested a private talk with Darcy.

“I know not where to start Mr Darcy. From a child, Lizzy has always been in one scrape or another. Always climbing trees, chasing chickens or falling into puddles of mud.”

Darcy had an image of a much younger Elizabeth, all tumbling curls and dirty petticoats. He thought of the children he wished to have, little Elizabeths roaming the halls of Pemberley making mischief. It was a beguiling vision.

“She was her mother’s despair” Mr Bennet continued, “but I rejoiced in her free spirit. Perhaps her mother was right all along. If she had been content to sit and embroider screens or sketch a landscape, she would have been safe. But then, that was always Lizzy. Happy to leap first and look after without a care for where she would fall.”

“No-one who knows her independent nature could fault it, Sir.” Darcy replied. “Miss Elizabeth is strong and fearless, afraid of no-one and willing to stand up for what she believes and for the people she cares for. Those are qualities to be admired, not diminished.”

Mr Bennet looked at Darcy as if he were seeing him properly for the first time. Darcy realised he would have to speak to this man soon about his intentions towards his daughter but he knew he could not do that without first having spoken to Elizabeth.

“Yes, you are right I suppose. Still. Look where that brought us this time. Not a tumble into a puddle of mud but near disaster. And I have you to thank for the avoidance of that disaster. Were it not for your quick thinking on that day and, it seems, your unswerving devotion to my daughter throughout the course of her illness, I fear I would have lost her. I have much to thank you for and fear I will never be able to repay you.”

Mr Bennet stood and offered Darcy his hand.

“Thank you for my daughter’s life”.

Darcy could see the tears gathering in Mr Bennet’s eyes and knew they were reflected in his own.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, we reach the end. Thank you to everyone for all of your kind comments and kudos. This is the first FF I have written and I have so enjoyed writing it. I only hope you have enjoyed reading it.

_Mr Bennet stood and offered Darcy his hand._

_“Thank you for my daughter’s life”._

_Darcy could see the tears gathering in Mr Bennet’s eyes and knew they were reflected in his own._

* * *

 

At breakfast the next morning, Jane Bennet placed herself next to Darcy.

“How is your sister this morning Miss Bennet?”

“I believe she is much better Mr Darcy, thank you. She slept well, shows no signs of the fever reoccurring and her breathing is improving all the time. In fact,” at this she lowered her voice so only he could hear her over the other occupants of the table talking “she states she is well enough to move to a chaise this afternoon and, that being so, would be very happy if you would do her the honour of a visit.”

Throughout this short speech from Miss Bennet, Darcy had felt his heart swell at the news of Elizabeth’s recovery. He had spent so long fearing the worst for her that he could not believe it now that she was safe from danger. When he heard that Elizabeth was well enough to sit out from her bed and had asked if he would go and see her, it took all his will power to stop himself from leaping out of his seat at that moment and dashing up the stairs. Instead, he swallowed and nodded as he looked towards Jane Bennet.

“That is excellent news, Miss Bennet. I would, of course, be honoured to call upon Miss Elizabeth this afternoon.”

OoOoO

The morning had felt interminable. Darcy had ridden out after breakfast to visit one of tenant farms and had met his steward afterwards to discuss what needed to be done to prepare for the coming spring planting. Still, he now paced his study planning what he was going to say to Elizabeth when he saw her. He had not held back in his admiration and concern for her when she was ill, but now she was to be well again, he felt his old reticence beginning to return. What if she just wanted to thank him for his kindness? What if her seeming affection for him during her illness was just a product of her fear?

This would not do.

Memories of Elizabeth’s hand on his face, of her holding his arms and staring into his eyes, of her asking for him in her fever returned to him. He had not imagined those moments; knew them to be true. Whatever she felt for him now, it was not the abhorrence she had spoken of in Kent. He had to know. No matter the outcome, he had to know.

OoOoO

Darcy took a breath and rested his head against the cool wood of the door. He was still unsure exactly what this meeting would hold but knew that on the other side of the door, Elizabeth sat. He straightened his back, sent up a silent prayer and knocked.

The door was opened by Jane Bennet. She welcomed him in and explained, taking up her embroidery, she would remain seated on the other side of the room while he spoke to Elizabeth.

Darcy barely heard what she said but slowly nodded his head anyway, feeling some kind of response was due.

Sitting by the window, bathed in early spring sunlight, was Elizabeth. And she was smiling at him.

“Mr Darcy.” Her voice sounded shaky and weak still. She took a breath and tried again. “Mr Darcy, I cannot tell you how glad I am that you could spare the time to see me. I hope you will forgive my not rising to greet you; I find I am left annoyingly weak from my illness.”

Darcy realised he had not yet moved into the room, Georgiana’s sitting room, nor had he spoken. He was transfixed by the sight of her. Pushing himself forward, he moved across the room towards where she sat.

“Do not trouble yourself Miss Elizabeth. You have been most unwell and I am pleased beyond measure to see you sitting up and looking so healthy again.” He smiled down at her and, moving a chair so that he could remain as close as propriety allowed, sat.

“I asked you to come to see me today to allow me to thank you for all you have done for me in my illness. I am well aware that, were it not for you, I would have perished, either in the frozen pond or during my illness. I owe you so much Mr Darcy.”

He wanted to shout out. This couldn’t be. This return to polite nothingness, thanks for his kind behaviour. Did she not know what she was to him? He again realised he had been silent.

“Please Miss Elizabeth, do not thank me. It was my honour and privilege to be able to help you when you were of need.”

“Yes, well. That is very gracious of you Mr Darcy and I thank you for it. I also wanted to speak to you of another matter.”

Elizabeth glanced over at her sister, sitting quietly in a corner of the room. He had never seen Elizabeth look like this before and realised that she was nervous. With unexpected clarity, Darcy realised that Jane Bennet must know everything about his and Elizabeth’s history. He suddenly knew why he had been called here today: Elizabeth was kindly telling him that she didn’t return his feelings. He straightened in his chair, determined to get through this interview with honour. He could feel the pain of it later.

“Pray, continue Miss Elizabeth.”

“I have been thinking about my accident. You see, when I felt the ice crack beneath me and I fell into the pond, it felt as if the world around me slowed down. I was certain I would never surface again. I thought of Jane and my father. Of their hearing the news of my death and how upset they would both be. I thought of my aunt and uncle and the blame they would assign to themselves. But mostly, mostly, I thought of you.”

Darcy could scarce believe what he was hearing. Laening towards her, he asked “You thought of me?”

“Yes. I thought I was dying you see and all I could think was that I was going to die without you ever knowing my true feelings. When I first read your letter, I was ashamed of myself for how I had felt about you. Oh, I was ashamed of you too. Your behaviour with Bingley and Jane was wrong but the more I read and re-read, and your letter is smoothed almost to transparency now from my touch, the more I realised that perhaps you did what you did out of love and loyalty to Mr Bingley, no matter how misplaced, rather than a distain for my family. When my aunt and uncle asked if I would accompany them to Lambton, I said yes in the hopes that we might meet again. That day in the bookseller’s, when I turned and saw you, I could barely speak from embarrassment. It was foolish of me to hope you would still love me; to hope you would renew your addresses after I had treated you so abominably. And then your sister invited us for tea, you returned the visit and we came for dinner. I allowed that hope to bloom, as I had scarce allowed it to bloom before. Surely if you had decided against me, you would not welcome me into your home. I was out walking that day on your land to feel close to you. Perhaps I even hoped to see you. And then I fell through the ice and it was all in vain. I would die and you would never know. And so now I am telling you this.” She looked away and took a breath before returning her gaze to his.

“I love you.”

She said it so simply, so honestly that he could barely believe it. He closed his eyes and felt relief wash over him. “Elizabeth, say it again.”

“I love you, Fitzwilliam Darcy.”

Darcy was on his knees in front of her before she had finished speaking his name. Taking her hands in his, he kissed them over and over, saying her name like an incantation. She released one of her hands and placed it on his head, running her fingers through his hair. Raising his head, he could see tears pooling in her eyes. Her smile illuminated her face; she looked beatific.

Half standing, he moved his hands to cup her face. As he lowered his lips to hers, he repeated the question he had asked almost a year ago, although this time it was asked much simpler and with a truer heart.

“Marry me?”

As his lips hovered over hers, he felt as much as heard her reply. “Yes”.

He closed what was left of the gap between them and smiled as he touched his lips to hers.


	15. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone that subscribed, gave kudos or commented on my story. As I said at the start, it is the first time I have written anything and I so enjoyed writing it that it was a real bonus to find anyone else enjoyed reading it when I began posting! A few people kindly asked for an epilogue. I really struggled with this. I had written the final chapter at the same time I wrote the first so knew exactly how I wanted it to end. But I also really wanted to write an epilogue. 
> 
> Last Thursday, I was back at Lyme Park. It was a beautiful day, we are having an early summer heatwave here in the UK. I sat on the lower lawn at the back of the house, eating strawberries and watching the light play off the lake, and suddenly there were Elizabeth and Darcy. 
> 
> Hope you like it! (and yes, I was pretending to be Elizabeth awaiting my own Darcy to arrive. I guess this epilogue will have to suffice!).

Darcy jumped down from his horse and threw the reins to the stable boy. It really was too hot to be out riding today. Turning, he decided to go through the gardens rather than the front of the house. He knew he would never tire of Pemberley but in late summer, with his mother’s rose garden in full bloom, it felt like another Eden.

As he made his way down towards the lower lawn, Darcy was arrested by the sight of Elizabeth sitting on a blanket in the late summer sunshine. He approached and could see she was reading something, a letter perhaps, and eating from a bowl of strawberries at her side. Hearing his approach, she turned her head and smiled up at him.

“Fitzwilliam! I thought you would be out for longer. Come, join me on my blanket.”

Elizabeth patted the ground next to her and Darcy gracefully lowered himself down, pillowing his head on her lap. He smiled up at Elizabeth as she fed him a strawberry and ran a hand through his hair. Above her were clear blue skies. How had he deserved this much happiness?

“Did I interrupt your reading with my arrival?”

“Yes, but it doesn’t follow that the interruption was unwelcome. It was a letter from Jane. She says that she and Charles are finding life at Netherfield… difficult. It appears I was right, a woman can be settled too near her family. They are considering purchasing an estate. Perhaps I shall invite them to stay at Pemberley and see if we can tempt them with all Derbyshire has to offer.”

Darcy closed his eyes and hummed his agreement with the prospective visit, allowing his thoughts to drift. He thought back to the day of his proposal seven months prior. The day she had accepted him, he had felt joy unbound. Moments from that day came back to him now. The first touch of Elizabeth’s lips on his; turning to see Jane Bennet smiling down at her embroidery before she looked up and welcoming him as a brother; sharing his news with Georgianna, who was so happy she had cried and hugged him before rushing to see Elizabeth.

He had sought a private audience with Mr Bennet straight away, wanting his happiness sanctioned as soon as could be. Elizabeth’s father had expected the conversation, although perhaps not as soon as it had come. “I always felt that no man could possibly deserve my Lizzy. I am glad to have been proven wrong.”

As soon as Elizabeth had been well enough, two betrothed couples had all travelled from Pemberley to Hertfordshire, Bingley having been eager to secure Jane’s hand after failing to ensure his own happiness last November. Banns were called and they were married alongside Bingley and Jane on a beautiful May morning in the church in Meryton. In truth, Darcy scarcely remembered the details of his wedding day. He had never felt as nervous as he did as he had stood at the front of the church, his cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam at his side. The moment Elizabeth entered the church and he had turned to see her in her bridal gown, he had felt such pure happiness. After that, he could remember nothing but her and a feeling of bliss that had settled upon him.

They had journeyed to Lake District for their wedding trip. On their last night, they had stood on the balcony of their temporary home next to Lake Windermere. Darcy had looked over to Elizabeth, with the moonlight glimmering on the lake behind her, and his breath was taken away by her beauty and vivacity. What had he done to deserve her love? She had felt him looking and turned to smile at him, a smile that he had no choice but to return. Whatever he had hoped for from his first few weeks of his married life had been surpassed. He had loved her in Kent with a detachment borne of a desire to deny that love. When he thought her lost to him after she refused him, he had hopelessly tried to move on, to conquer his love. During the winter in Pemberley, when he feared her lost to him forever, he felt his love for her with a desperation. Now though, now that he knew her heart to be his, that their souls were joined and they woke up entwined together each morning, he knew that the love he had felt before their marriage had been but a shadow, a promise of a love that continued to grow.

He was recalled to the present by Elizabeth speaking his name.

“Fitzwilliam?”

Opening his eyes, he looked up towards her, “Yes, dearest?”

“I had cause to ask Doctor Andrews to visit me today.”

He felt a chill run through his body. Andrews had been at his home to see Elizabeth without his knowledge. He believed that there were no ill effects from her accident in the winter but obviously he was wrong. Fool.

Sitting up, he grasped both of her hands and braced himself to hear the worst. Elizabeth could not mistake the fear in his eyes.

“You are unwell? Why did you not tell me? Elizabeth, what did Andrews say?”

“Fitzwilliam, calm yourself. I am well. Perfectly well. I have had my suspicions for some weeks and wrote to my Aunt Gardiner who suggested speaking to a medical man. I wanted confirmation before sharing this news with you, you see.”

Elizabeth’s smile grew as she spoke and the feeling of dread that had settled on Darcy when Elizabeth had first mentioned Doctor Andrews began to be replaced by something else, something lighter.

“Elizabeth, do you…? Are you…?”

In answer, Elizabeth took one of his hands that still held hers and placed it onto her abdomen.

“Yes, Fitzwilliam.” Elizabeth replied, her eyes glistening, “I am with child. You are to be a father. Doctor Andrews believes Pemberley will have a new addition to the household sometime next spring.”

No words could express the pure delight Fitzwilliam Darcy felt at this news. “I am to be a father?” he repeated, wonder in his voice. “Elizabeth, I thought nothing, nothing could add to the joy you have given me already and here you offer me more.”

He cupped her face in his hands and, smiling, kissed her.

Elizabeth lay her head on his chest and closed her eyes, “I love you, Fitzwilliam”.

Darcy rested his cheek on the top of her head “And I adore you, Elizabeth Darcy”.

Looking out over the lake at Pemberley, he thought of the new life Elizabeth had given him and the life she now carried inside her. As he thought, he watched the sunlight shining down, dancing on the lake and warming the earth. He had never felt such peace.


End file.
